How To Have More Energy And Learning To Say N-O!
The #BEMORE life means we do hard things. We take on topics that others avoid, we work on things in our life that so many people ignore and we strive to BE more by really focusing on who we are becoming, every single day.
Today I want to talk to you about ENERGY! Learning to have more energy, how to steward our energy and learning to say N-O.
Some of you just sank. 'Oh dear, she’s going to talk about that. I have a hard time saying no', some of you are thinking. Others are giving reasons for why there’s always a good reason they can’t say no.
Let’s go here, shall we?
How would you like to JUMP out of bed in the morning, feel excited for your day, even if your joints were aching a bit because of age or weather…. even if things weren’t going the way you wanted them to go, or as you had expected? How would you like to STILL have energy and hope for each day, because you know, the #BEMORE life is truly yours?
One of the most important things you’re going to need to learn and WALK IT OUT.… is learning the ability to say no, without regret, without feeling false guilt and being fully confident that our no means no.
There was a time in my life that saying no was nearly impossible. I questioned my no. I doubted my no. I regretted my no. Sheesh, I was afraid if I said no someone would get hurt and then they’d get mad so for goodness sakes, to avoid going down that emotional rabbit hole, I might as well just say yes! And I hated it.
Then I went through a season where I said no all the time! Most of the time I said no. I was finding my boundaries and stretching my legs toward living more of my truest self and I didn’t want to be manipulated, prodded or talked into anything ANYMORE! So no no no no and I’m so sorry but NO! This is what I said all the time. I began to regret all of my nos because now I was saying no just so I didn’t have to deal with disappointment and no because I didn’t want to risk pushing myself so hard I would get sick. I spent so many years pushing myself for everything and everyone, that I got to the point of saying no, way too much. OH MY WORD!
Some of you who are reading my words right now are so exhausted, and it’s not because you’re doing so much everyday that you’re crashing into your bed every night, completely spent. It’s because the emotional turmoil in your head is draining everything you’re doing all day long.
Mental and emotional exhaustion, and trying to live up to the expectations of others can cause incredible fatigue. It’s more draining than living on 500 calories and working out twice a day! It will make you sick!
Do you know how to say NO and feel powerful?
Right now, grab your planner, calendar or whatever you use to manage your life. If you don’t use anything to keep yourself powerfully on track, than today is going to be Day #1 of getting everything out of your head and onto paper or a digital system!
Let’s go here.
What is on your calendar? What can be removed? Where have you overextended yourself, not allowed for any quiet time for yourself at night or in the morning? Are you allowing yourself to breathe a few times per week or do you go from morning until night time, nonstop every single day?
A part of learning to #BEMORE, have more energy, feel lighter and live more powerfully is learning to say NO! So…. find 5 things on your calendar this month that you know you don’t have to do. Someone else can do it. Someone else might not want to do it, but they certainly can do it. Now, cross off those 5 things and pass them onto someone else. Or just don't do them at all. You don't have to go to every school, church, neighborhood event. You don't have to go to everything you're invited to. Being healthy means saying no, so you can stay powerful and be more!
Do you find yourself saying these words at all during the day- "It would be easier for me to just do this myself so why bother having anyone else do it? Because by the time I teach someone else to do this, I could have already done it on my own"? That might be true of some things, but it also might be a covert way of being in control of everything and a sign you just can’t say no. Or you won’t let anyone help you. Both of these things are dangerous.
Baby steps today.
5 things you can take off your calendar in the next 30 days. Then I want you to find one thing you’ve been wanting to do, and do it! NOW you have some time. A class you wanted to take? A book you wanted to read? A nap you really need to start taking during the day?
When I learned to fit into my schedule time for myself, it was amazing how much energy I started to have. I also found that it got easier to say NO to things that didn’t serve me well. We must prove all things, and hold onto the things that serve us well, now. What serves you well now, might not serve you well next year. What served you well last year, might now be something you have to say NO to.
So…. today. Say no, to 5 things. If you’re just so busy that you can’t say no, you are truly, just too busy. Even if we have young children, are a single mother, and are alone in a city, the truth is: We don’t have to do everything. We can make new friends. We can ask for help. We can reach out to others. We are in control and we can do whatever we want, in our truest most powerful life.
So…. free up some space on your calendar and learn to say NO. It will affect how you sleep, how you feel, the energy you have during the day and ultimately, your stress level.
I am at the point in my life that if something or someone causes undue stress long enough- it has to go. No questions about it. Life is too short and the #BEMORE life is my focus. Someone else can do it, or the relationship has to end. Boundaries. It's a very powerful key to a #BEMORE life.
You can go there too! Let me say this in closing, if you're a small business owner here's a tip that might shock some of you. To say yes all of the time, be available ALL of the time and constantly change your schedule all of the time so that you don't miss that 'one big break' doesn't make you look powerful. It actually makes you look desperate and like you have no boundaries. I won't work with ANYONE who doesn't have boundaries. I don't care if they're a TV show host or the top person in an organization that I'm hoping to do business with. Doesn't matter to me. No boundaries = no power and I won't go there with anyone. Learning to say NO shows you are powerful, and it will make you MUCH more attractive and sought after in the marketplace. Remember that!
This is an excerpt from a 30 day email coaching program I'm doing called, "The #BEMORE No Diet" program. It's an INTENSIVE email course where I'm walking 3000 people through a process of learning to think powerfully, live effectively AND change how they live so they have more energy, look younger and lose weight WITHOUT dieting! I'll be releasing group #2 in case you're interested in about a week.